A Gilded Planet

FETHIYE 5/30/12 - We are on a dolmuş, a small, cramped, hot little rocket to Kayakoyu. Kayakoyu is a Greek village in southern Turkey that was abandoned after a 1923 "population exchange." We are with Brandon, an Asian-Australian fellow who had been living in London for the last couple of years. Shortly after Turkey, he's taking a 5 month trip to South America. He's been out of university for at least five years now, so it sounds like it's possible to do such things after starting a career. Kayakoyu, Turkey Sitting in the ruins of this 17th century Greek Orthodox High Church, I am reminded of the pictures I have seen of the bombed ruins of World War II era Europe. Yet this city wasn't bombed, rather its population was deported almost ninety years ago. Since then, nature has taken its toll. Staggering.

A reader and friend writes in to tell me that the OED traces 'immersive' from as far back as the seventeenth century, or much earlier than I acknowledged in the previous post . Clearly the OED's SEO needs improvement, Merriam Webster is fucked, and I need to be a bit more thorough in my researches.

Update: I'm an idiot. 'Immersive' is not a word according to the Merriam Webster Online Dictionary. Wait. I know what you're thinking: but then how do I describe my experience with Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim ? How do I do that, huh? Luckily, less reputable online dictionaries do define 'immersive' as a word in the following way: noting or pertaining to digital technology or images that deeply involve one's senses and may create an altered mental state For some reason, I find it very surprising that it took digital technology to motivate us to come up with the word 'immersive.' Did earlier generations not imagine novels or movies to be immersive experiences? Is there another word out there that I'm forgetting which does the same work as 'immersive'? I would like to know this synonym.  

The heat! The heat! Oh how could we possibly consider ignoring the aching fever and vicious intestinal malaise to face the Greek heat in all its unforgivable Apollonian glory? What could compel our bodies, trembling with putrid illness, to traipse through the invincible sunshine of Athens? Only the vision of the Parthenon, that proudest dream of Pericles, the long lost world of Classical Greece from which we still draw intellectual succor. Only that. As we approached the ancient theatre of Dionysus, god of wine, celebrations, ritual madness and ecstasy, Zeus smiled down on us (or was it Athena herself?) in at least one way. For some reason, admission to the Acropolis was free on this sweltering Monday, June 3rd. Despite this welcome largesse, the Acropolis was not choked with vistors or the dreaded touring groups that descend like locusts from cruise ships at any grand sight near enough to the sea. All praise be to the Olympian deities for this fortunate turn of events. ...a...

CAPPADOCIA, 5/26/12 -- We ended up on a wild ride to the airport. Some kind of gong show ding dong gumball fuck up caused our shuttle to wait too long at a hotel where we picked up no one before eventually pulling over to the shoulder of the freeway to wait for another shuttle that brought two people the shuttle was supposed to have picked up earlier. We don't know if the two passengers weren't in the place they were supposed to be or if the shuttle wasn't. The two passengers denied everything and the shuttle drivers explained nothing as they spoke very little English. On the freeway, we got a taste of insane Turkish driving, where passing is a game of chicken and close calls, horns are employed liberally, tailgating is a way of life based on intimidation and anything is fair game on the shoulder. It didn't help that multiple roads were closed. Each detour ratcheted up the intensity even further. We made our flight, praise Allah.

On May 22nd, we visited the Istanbul Museum of Modern Art and saw lots of works by many different 20th century Turkish painters and artists. I was pleasantly surprised by the number of female artists that were represented. A few of the artists represented were not Turkish but had worked in Istanbul or Turkey at some point and so their work was being exhibited. Some of my favorites included Fahrelnissa Zeid, Eren Eyüboğlu, Yüksel Arslan and the American Jennifer Steinkamp. The view from outside the Istanbul Museum of Modern Art After the museum we found a small gallery exhibiting new works by the American artist Mel Bochner. His work had a pungent, garish irony to it. Then we left to find lunch. We explored (and by explored I mean we got a bit lost in) some of the narrow side streets of the Beyoğlu district. But getting lost is part of it. In the alleyways, we saw men playing backgammon and drinking tea. For Turkish men of a certain age, this seems to be the primary pasti...

Cappadocia has awakened my inner Indiana Jones. Cappadocia is a remarkable and strange landscape infested with secret worlds, hermetic and sacred, and unlocking their magical wonders constitutes a job for only the most intrepid of archaeologist-adventurers. In a terrain of volcanic anomaly, in underground cities and cathedrals built into caves, we vanquished the the most terrible of our fears. We met loneliness, despair and anguish with curiosity, wonder and braggadocio. I'll begin again. On May 25th, we explored Derinkuyu, the biggest underground city in Cappadocia. There are dozens of underground settlements in Cappadocia, though most are very small and only able to house a few families. The underground city of Derinkuyu is by far the most fascinating thing I've seen on this trip. Derinkuyu stretches deep beneath the earth. The thirteenth level is over 300 feet underneath the surface of the earth. Only the first eight levels are safe to visit. When we reached the...

The abandoned front of Smokey Joe's Artemis Restaurant  Don't go to Faliraki. Ever. It is one of the worst towns I've ever been to in Greece or anywhere else. Faliraki is on the eastern coast of the Greek island of Rhodes. It is infested with the dreary remnants of the most outlandish kitsch and sleaze. On one block you will find the Tiger Tiger Strip Club, on the next Bedrock - a Flintstones themed 'family restaurant - and on the block after that, an abandoned amusement park of horrifying clown faces that looks like it comes straight out of a monster reincarnation of Coney Island. The town is studded with massive, overpriced resorts that aspire to luxury but could never achieve such a thing in the place they are located. Everyone looks like they are taking their last vacation ever before they have to pack it in and face the cruel justice of death. Faliraki: Where the Fun Never Stops Killing You You would never know you're in Greece. All sig...

On our second day in Istanbul (Sunday, May 20th), we planned to see some of the more famous landmarks the metropolis has to offer. We woke up early to get in line for the Hagia Sophia before it became outrageous. It helped that Sunday was marked by cloudy skies and occasional showers. The line was mercifully quick. Outside the Hagia Sophia On the way, we noticed a strange van parked at the front of the Hagia Sophia selling Museum passes. We didn't buy any, though maybe we should have considering the number of Museum tickets we bought in Istanbul. But selling Museum passes out of the back of a van demonstrates Turkish cultural practice in a key way. It's highly commercialized, but in a different way from the U.S. Everything everywhere is a kiosk; everyone is selling something. It's refreshingly honest and straightforward in its intention. No one seems to pretend the mercantile pursuit is anything other than what it is, or that it's anything less than total in its sc...

Late one night, I obtained a large truck to steal the stones from the Temple of Artemis. With some assistance from hired locals, I loaded the stones into the vehicle and drove off into the darkness. The next morning, no one seemed to notice.

On Monday, May 25th, our third day in Istanbul, we went to the Spice Bazaar for a second time. It was mobbed to the point of anguish last time, but on Monday it was just fairly busy. After taking the tram to the Eminönü stop near the Galata Bridge that crosses the Golden Horn, we stumbled into the animal and pet quarter of the Spice Bazaar. Large tanks of leeches were scattered about the block. As far as I know, they are used for medicinal purposes. The rest of the animal quarter seemed to be dedicated to pets. Cages of rabbits, dogs, chickens, peacocks and cats dominated our attention. Cats roam around everywhere in Istanbul. You can find them wiggling on every corner. But I guess buying one from the Spice Bazaar might be a way to avoid bringing fleas home. I also saw kiosks that had large quantities of what appeared to be nuts and legumes, but on closer inspection I realized it was pet food. From there we explored the bazaar's endless kiosks of spices, nuts, teas, fruit (...